Thursday, October 27, 2005

The End Is Nigh

I have incontrovertible proof. There are those who say that the recent spate of wars, pestilence, floods, and earthquakes give proof that the world is nearing its end. But they are wrong. As terrible as those things have been human catastrophes have occurred for as long as there have been people. No, the proof I have is far more undeniable. The Red Sox and the White Sox have won back to back World Series.

The odds of that happening are far greater than the possibility of the sun rising in the west tomorrow or that Bill Frist really didn’t know that HCA stock was going to take a dive. No, we’re doomed. None of us are going to get out of here alive. So I suggest if there are things in your life that you need to set right now is the time, for there is no time like the present.

There is perhaps one argument, slight though it may be, for a different explanation. It is possible that some cosmic foot fetish is engulfing the universe. And as comforting as that might be to some there are those who would consider that to be a fate far worse than the end of the world.

If by some miracle we do survive and the Cubs win the World Series next year, all bets are off.

The Bush Credo - No Sacrifice Is Too Great For Others To Make.

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